


Self destruct

by LadyAbigail



Series: Tumblr prompts [4]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Crying doesn't mean you're weak, Depression, F/M, Mental Breakdown, Mental Health Issues, emotional breakdown
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-15
Updated: 2017-04-15
Packaged: 2018-10-19 04:13:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,223
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10631955
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyAbigail/pseuds/LadyAbigail
Summary: Can Sam & Dean help you before  you self destruct?





	

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this because I'm having some mental health issues right now. So everything that Sam & Dean do is something I could use right now.

Everything was falling apart around you. No matter what you did you couldn’t pull yourself out of it this time. You were going through the motions now. Getting yourself out of bed, showering and all that. If you had it your way you’d stay curled up as a human burrito and only get up to use the bathroom. You were glad that the boys decided to do the interviews today because the moment they left, you headed to the bathroom.

The boys headed outside and when they slid into the Impala Sam turned his head towards Dean who was getting ready to start up Baby. Sam felt like he needed to say this now.

“Dean, I think something is wrong with her.” Sam let out a sigh. He could only hope Dean had noticed it too.

“I’m glad I’m not the only one who has noticed.” Dean took his hand off the ignition switch for a moment. “She’s not herself. It’s like she’s given up which is weird because that girl fights for everything. ”

“I think she’s in self destruct mode Dean.” Sam couldn’t believe he spoke those words out loud.

“You gotta explain that one Sammy.”

“Basically she’s holding everything inside and there’s only so much anybody can take.” Sam thought of a way to explain it. “Okay so think of it like this. Imagine a water balloon being filled up and when it reached a certain point it breaks.”

“So what you’re saying is that if she breaks she could potentially do something harmful like go into a hunt reckless.” Dean placed his hand on the top of the steering wheel. He didn’t like this.

“I’m afraid if she doesn’t let go of whatever she’s bottling up soon she may end up hurting herself Dean.”

Dean squeezed the steering wheel as he reached down to start up Baby. He refused to let you hurt yourself. You meant to much to the both of them. When they get back from the interviews it would be time to have a talk with you.

The interviews seemed to have dragged on forever. Dean found himself asking the same question a few times. He was to worried about you. He was worried about what they might come back to at the hotel. When the interviews were finally over Sam & Dean got into the Impala and drove as fast as they could back to the hotel they were staying in. They had to come up with a plan that wouldn’t scare you away. After about 20 minutes of talking it was decided that Sam would go in first then Dean would go in about 15 minutes after. It would probably be best if you only saw one at first. That way it wouldn’t feel like you were being ganged up on.

When Sam entered the room he heard you in the bathroom and he quickly went and unlocked the patio door. You guys has gotten lucky and got a 1st level room. It was a rare occasion that the guys splurged on a decent hotel room but they were glad they did. After hearing you come out of the bathroom Sam leaned against the wall and waited.

“Jesus Christ,Sam.” You practically jump off of the floor when you notice him. You weren’t expecting them back for awhile. Since you didn’t see Dean with him you just assumed he was at one of the bars trying to pick up some floozy.

“You can’t keep doing this to yourself.” Sam let out a sigh as he watched you. He was going to bring it up casually but it was best just to rip the damn bandaid off. “You can’t keep everything inside. You’ll self destruct.”

“Then maybe I’ll self destruct Sam! Why the hell do you and Dean suddenly decide to care now?”

You knew deep down that Sam & Dean cared. You had absolutely no idea where this was coming from. You turned and stalked towards the door to leave the room. You couldn’t stand to look at the 6'4 man in front of you and you sure as hell couldn’t face his brother whenever he got back. Before you had a chance to get to the door Sam stepped into your path. There was no way he was letting you get past him and because of his tall frame and muscle build it would be hard to get past him.

“Get out of my way Winchester.” You growl through clenched teeth.

“Absolutely not.” Sam told you as he reached up to cup your cheeks. “I want to help you. Dean and I want to help you.”

“I don’t need help.I can deal with this by myself.” You told him as you pulled away. You wanted away from him. You wanted to deal with this on your own. You always dealt with this on your own. When he tried to reach out for you again you actually got physical. You placed your arms out in front of you and you pushed him. Of course it didn’t much good. He barely moved back.

Dean had just slipped in through the patio door when he saw you try and push Sam out of the way. It didn’t work. Dean knew that Sam wasn’t going anywhere unless he wanted to. Dean caught the attention of his brother who just gave him a slight nod. They were hoping they wouldn’t have to do this. Quietly moving behind you Dean reached around and pulled you in for a hug from behind. He was also expecting you to start fighting him. He expected you to try and headbutt him and try to get away but all you did was stay still. It only took a few seconds of silence for the tears to start flowing from your eyes. You never cried. It made you weak. You never once saw the Winchesters cry. Dean kept his arms around you as he helped you over to one of the beds. Once they had you laying down Dean stroked at your back while Sam knelt next to the bed and his fingers went up to stroke at your hair. They wanted you to let it all out.

“Only….weak…people…cry.” you somehow managed to form those four words as the tears continued to fall.

“Crying doesn’t mean you’re weak.” Sam whispered to you. “It’s a sign that you’re alive.”

After that final word left Sam’s lips you found yourself starting to sob. You wanted comfort. You wanted them both. When Sam stood up to leave you and Dean alone you reached up and grabbed onto his white shirt. You refused to let it go. Looking down at Dean Sam shook his head and he scooted over to make room. After kicking off his dress shoes Sam went to lay down next to you. Thinking that you had only wanted Sam, Dean sat up but you reaches around to try and grab onto him.

“I think she wants us both here Dean,” Sam spoke quietly as he reached up and stroked at your hair again.

Dean didn’t say a word as he turned onto his side and curled up behind you. His fingers traveled up your side then interlocked into yours. He would stay here forever if he had to. He knew Sam would too.


End file.
